Assemble the Worst QB Ever

[Willmark]

Since we're in the off season a bit of fun. I figured I'd post this here because it really doesn't fit any forum perfectly. I was trying to work on something else and got sidetracked.

We've likely all seen a "Franken QB build" on the web, articles etc of the best aspect of a individual QBs game or physical trait to build the ultimate QB. This is the opposite...If you were a mad scientist and stitched together a unholy combination of the worst traits of an NFL QB, here is what I came up with:

The Abomination Under Center
A stitched-together horror of blown draft picks, broken knees, and butt fumbles - the quarterback no fan base can escape, and no defense fears.
Position: Quarterback (allegedly)
Era: Eternal Disappointment
Franchise Impact: Set back every team he “led” by a decade

(Imgur is being a pain with the links:)
https://imgur.com/gallery/worst-qb-ever ... ed-Z2MVYGJ
https://imgur.com/gallery/qb-horror-2-ALfzZjv)

[Willmark]

As you well know one play does not prove the rule. Rather shows the exception.

[Xramfan]

In case the images aren’t working:

Trait — Player Inspiration — Disaster Result

Ball Security — Daunte Culpepper
Ball hits turf faster than a Derek Carr checkdown.
I’d add the turd because he would flinch and begin losing the ball before actual contact at times.

INT Machine — George Blanda (1962 edition)
42 picks in 14 games. They had to invent new mistakes.

Decision Making — Brett Favre
Hero or chaos — roll the dice and find out.

Field Vision — Neil O’Donnell (SB XXX edition)
Thinks the corner is running a post route.

Field Awareness — Dan Orlovsky
Two steps into the abyss, never looked back.

Arm Strength — Jameis Winston
Lasers into triple coverage with pride, repeatedly.

Clutch Gene — Jim Kelly (postseason)
Folds like origami in the Super Bowl.

Appearance — Rob Johnson
Looked like a QB, played like a crash-test dummy.

Arrogance — Josh Rosen
“Nine mistakes ahead of me.” Every team said: “And you were ten.”

Attitude — Ryan Leaf
Feuds with media, fans, and the waterboy.

Media Savvy — Also Ryan Leaf
“I don’t need you.” Also: follows you on Twitter just to block you.

Likeability — Cade McNown
The exact wrong guy to lead a comeback or a locker room.

Coachability — Jeff George
Responds to critique with a 70-yard bomb… to the Gatorade cooler.

Work Ethic — Johnny Manziel
Out-studied by fans on Twitter.

Study Habits — JaMarcus Russell
Watches “film” that doesn’t exist.

Football IQ — Akili Smith
The mental chalkboard is blank.

Ethics — Art Schlichter
Gambled his way out of the league — and into prison.

Heart — Jay Cutler
Face said “meh,” play said “meh,” results said “meh.”

Mobility — Peyton Manning (2015 edition)
Statue of Liberty moves faster.

Physique — Jared Lorenzen
Can’t wear standard pads — needs custom shoulder buffet trays.

Fragility — Sam Bradford
Can’t throw if he’s always hurt — and he always is.

Age — George Blanda (again), 1970s version
Looked like a grandfather, played like one too.

Pre-Draft Hype — Heath Shuler
“Surefire!” said Mel Kiper.

Preseason Hype — Nate Peterman
Lit it up in August… then threw 5 INTs in his first half of real action.

Failure to Fulfill Potential — Todd Marinovich
RoboQB.exe has stopped working.

College – University of Houston QBs — Andre Ware
Heisman hype, pro bust. Promised fireworks, delivered ashes.

Collegiate Hype / Career NFL Backup Reality — Steve Spurrier
Heisman pedigree, clipboard legacy. Remembered more for his visor than his throws.

Win-Loss Record vs NFL Teams — Derek Carr
Managed to lose to 31 of 32 teams.

Sobriety on the Field — Bobby Layne
Allegedly played better buzzed. Problem is, he always was.

Clock Management — Donovan McNabb
Thought overtime was a gentleman’s handshake.

Nickname (Mark Sanchez) — “The Sanchize”
Sounds like a bad menu entry, ends in a butt fumble.

Contract Sinkhole — Deshaun Watson
$230M for a ghost in pads.

Edited a bit

[Rainman56]

[BoKnows81]

I mean idk, I thought we saw the worst QB ever assembled starting last year for the Silver n Black.

[Attyla]

I mean idk, I thought we saw the worst QB ever assembled starting last year for the Silver n Black.

Pickett?

[HesterLayes]

Ability to read a defense-Geno
Heart-Carr
Toughness in pocket-Carr
Arm-Pennington(but I liked him)

[SkullCrusher]

Keep it all Raiders, because we can make a dewzy all by ourselves.

Smarts - Russell
Arm Strength - Jimmy G
Legs - AOC (For entire NFL I didn't see Kosar listed)
Braveness - Carr
Field Vision - Geno
Accuracy - Schroeder
Coachable - George (Russell already picked for a cat) One of my fave stories from Papa was, the Raiders have a screen play drawn up and George throws to the Z on a fly route because on paper it shows them on the opposite side running straight ahead and to him that is an option. That's high IQ stuff right there!
Leadership - Russell/George even if they had already been picked.

It's unfair to put Andrew Walters in this 'cause of circumstances, but then is it fair to Geno? Oh well, that's a list.

[Toast]

The Run & Shoot offense at the NCAA level created hype based on inflated passing statistics. You see this with Air Raid disciples as well. Those offenses tend to mask deficiencies behind impressive conventional passing metrics.

I am trying to apply some brevity as I think about this-Mirage Syndrome? Dick Tease? Catfish QB? A chump in champs clothing?

I dunno, but players like Andre Ware and David Klingler that tore up the NCAA didn't look like they even belonged in the NFL. Neil Lomax is the only run and shoot QB that I can think of that successfully adapted to a pro style offense and had some success.

Warren Moon never played in a Run & Shoot scheme until he was a veteran in the NFL.

[HesterLayes]

The Run & Shoot offense at the NCAA level created hype based on inflated passing statistics. You see this with Air Raid disciples as well. Those offenses tend to mask deficiencies behind impressive conventional passing metrics.

I am trying to apply some brevity as I think about this-Mirage Syndrome? Dick Tease? Catfish QB? A chump in champs clothing?

I dunno, but players like Andre Ware and David Klingler that tore up the NCAA didn't look like they even belonged in the NFL. Neil Lomax is the only run and shoot QB that I can think of that successfully adapted to a pro style offense and had some success.

Warren Moon never played in a Run & Shoot scheme until he was a veteran in the NFL.

Good post..as a kid here in st.louis I enjoyed watching Lomax..I was little and won’t cheat..Portland Star or something? I didn’t know it was a run and shoot school.

If ya look at Mahomes and Baker(basically any Kingsbury stuff) it seemed as close to run and shoot as it gets. But yes..I wanted Ware to succeed but it was no bueno..in the NFL the Oilers were really the only team that had success with it.

Check out the Mahomes/mayfield college box score sometime..if that’s not run and shoot shit,I don’t know what is haha.

I understand the run shoot had no tight end and only one back,but just saying many offenses later were similar by throwing every play

[raiderboyron]

Run & Shoot was Mouse Davis right? It was an exciting offensive concept. Ball was flyin' all over the field.

[vtraider]

I'm just going to put jamarcus Russell. That covers it

[Toast]

Good post..as a kid here in st.louis I enjoyed watching Lomax..I was little and won’t cheat..Portland Star or something? I didn’t know it was a run and shoot school.

If ya look at Mahomes and Baker(basically any Kingsbury stuff) it seemed as close to run and shoot as it gets. But yes..I wanted Ware to succeed but it was no bueno..in the NFL the Oilers were really the only team that had success with it.

Check out the Mahomes/mayfield college box score sometime..if that’s not run and shoot shit,I don’t know what is haha.

I understand the run shoot had no tight end and only one back,but just saying many offenses later were similar by throwing every play

Yes, Portland State. Mouse Davis introduced it to the NCAA with that program, as raiderboyron mentiioend. He took it to the USFL with Jim Kelly and put together an impressive passing offense with the Gamblers. The USFL's offensive innovations and talent level were perfect for that style of play. Had the league survived-and it didn't thanks to Trump (not political it just is what it is). I think it could have reached parity with the NFL (it nearly did in its own right), and I loved the idea of yearround football. I like the CFL and follow the BC Lions and thought NFL Europe was a great concept as well.

The Air Raid is similar to what Buddy Ryan used to call the "Chuck & Duck."

But, I have jumped the shark here. My apologies.

To the original thread I guess we could call this a system QB, reliant on a system to succeed. A lot of different offenses can mask a QB's game but coach coaching should do that anyways so I hate that label. The antithesis of the NFL combine star such as Anthony Richardson.

BYU's program is another one where the QB's haven't always parlayed their success to an NFL career. Ohio State really hasn't had any considering Stroud's regression.

Maybe would refer to those QB's as the Hope & Dream Passer-though I like Catfish QB better.